A lady finds out that she is pregnant, but she is worried. He husband has anger management issues, yelling a lot, breaking things, really horrible to be around. She doesn’t want her kids to be like that, so she asks her doctor for advice. Her doctor says “Rub your belly once a day every day […] More
A wife from Montana had an appointment with her doctor to ask for advice on how to treat her husband’s lack of sex drive. “Have you tried Viagra?” the doctor asked. “Not a chance,” the lady replied, “He doesn’t even take aspirin.” “Not a problem,” the doctor replied, “Just give him some Montana Viagra.” “What’s […] More
Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. “In honor of this holy season,” Saint Peter said, “You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into Heaven.” The first man fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. “It represents […] More
A Man Rushes Into A Bar And Says, “Quick! Give me a pint of lager!” No sooner does he finish that drink, he orders a whisky and slams it down. As fast as the bartender is pouring the drinks, the man is knocking them back, one after the other. The bartender says, “Are you okay […] More
Little Johnny had just passed his driving test and inquired of his father as to when they could discuss his use of the car. His father said he’d make a deal with his son, “You bring your grades up from a C to a B average, study your Bible a little, and get your hair […] More
Two dogs in a vets waiting room. 1st dog is old, grey around the muzzle has a bad limp and smells bad. 2nd dog, much younger, says to the old dog, ” Why are you here today ” Old dog replies, ”I am going to be put to sleep, i’m in very bad health, and […] More
Two old Italian men are sitting on a bench arguing about who is the most desirable woman in the world. The first says, “For me, it must be the greatest Italian actress, Sophia Loren. Every man who ever saw her movies fantasized about her.” The second man replies, “That’s what I used to think, but […] More
A man ordered a voice-automated robot car that does anything he tells it to do correctly without any error. He got the car and became very proud of what the car could do without mistakes. One day, he was home and his wife told him to tell the car to go and pick the children […] More
A man boarded an aeroplane and took his seat. As he settled in, he glanced up and saw the most beautiful woman boarding the plane. He soon realized she was heading straight towards his seat. As fate would have it, she took the seat right beside his. Eager to strike up a conversation he blurted […] More
It was time for Father John’s Saturday night bath and the young nun, Sister Magdalene, had prepared the bath water and towels just the way the old nun had instructed: Sister Magdalene was also instructed not to look at Father John’s nakedness if she could help it, do whatever he told her to do and […] More
They want to try BDSM for the first time. So one afternoon, the husband comes home from work, heads upstairs to the bedroom to change, and finds his wife spread out on the bed decked out in bondage gear and lingerie. Without skipping a beat the husband gets undressed and leans down and asks her […] More
A blonde walks into a store to buy a new Television She looks around for a while and finds the perfect TV for herself She approaches the salesman and says “I would like to buy this TV.” The salesman says “sorry, we cannot sell you this in good faith, I don’t think you know what […] More
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