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    An Old Lady Went To The Grocery Store

    A little old lady went to the grocery store and put the most expensive cat food in her basket. She then went to the check out counter where she told the check out girl, “Nothing but the best for my little kitten.” The girl at the cash register said, “I’m sorry, but we cannot sell […] More

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    An Old Woman From California Purchased A Timber

    An elderly woman from California purchased a piece of timberland in Oregon. There was a large tree on one of the highest points in the tract. She wanted to get a good view of her land, so she started to climb the big tree. As she neared the top, she encountered a spotted owl that […] More

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    An Attorney Went Into A Bar For Martini

    An attorney went into a bar for a Martini and found himself beside a scruffy-looking old drunk who kept mumbling and studying something in his hand. He leaned closer while the old drunk held the tiny object up to the light, slurring, “Well, it looks plastic.” Then he rolled it between his fingers, adding, “But […] More

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    An Elderly Man Traveling By Plane

    An elderly man travelling by plane was in urgent need of a restroom facility. But each time he tried, it was occupied. The flight attendant, aware of his predicament, suggested he use the attendant’s ladies room, but cautioned him not to press any of the buttons. There next to the paper roll were four buttons […] More

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    Chester And Earl Went Hunting

    Chester and Earl are going hunting. Chester says to Earl, I’ll send my dog out to see if there are any ducks out in the pond. If there aren’t any ducks out there, I’m not going hunting.” So he sends the dog out to the pond. The dog comes back and barks twice. Chester says, “Well I’m not going to […] More

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    A Young Boy Is Pulling His Wagon Up A Hill

    A young boy is pulling his wagon up a hill when one of the back wheels falls off and rolls down the hill. The young boy says: “I’ll be darned.” A local pastor heard him and said: You should not say that. Next time your wheel falls off say: ‘Praise the Lord.’” So the next […] More

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    Two Men Went Bear Hunting

    Two men went bear hunting. While one stayed in the cabin, the other went out looking for a bear. He soon found a huge bear, shot at it but only wounded it. The enraged bear charged toward him, he dropped his rifle and started running for the cabin as fast as he could. He ran […] More

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    A Census Taker In A Rural Area

    A census taker in a rural area went up to a farmhouse and knocked. When an old woman came to the door, he asked her how many children she had and their ages. She said, “Let’s see now, there’s the twins, Sally and Billy, they’re eighteen. And the twins, Seth & Beth, they’re sixteen. And […] More

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    An Old Cowboy Walks Into A Saloon

    An old Cowboy Walks Into a Saloon, Naked….except for his boots. “Where your clothes at, Slim?”, ask the one man Back at the barn. I was feeding the horses when a beautiful blonde drove up. She says, ‘I wanna show you something in the barn. Follow me.’ So I followed her. She says, ‘Take off […] More

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    Two Gas Men Were Out Checking Meters

    Two gas company servicemen, a senior training supervisor and a young trainee, were out checking meters in a suburban neighbourhood. They parked their truck at the end of the alley and worked their way to the other end. At the last house, a woman looking out her kitchen window watched the two men as they […] More

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    Johnny Got On The Bus

    A little Johnny got on the bus, sat next to a man reading a book, and noticed he had his collar backwards. The little Johnny asked why he wore his collar backwards. The man, who was a priest, said, ‘I am a Father.’ The little Johnny replied, ‘My Daddy is also a father, but he […] More

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